Do you ever get scared that your life will to amount to exactly zero things?

i do. All the time. 

The song remembers when.

My dad loves James Taylor, and by default so do I.

I mean you haven't experienced life until you're cruising down the back roads of Wisconsin singing "sweet baby james" eating ice cream with my farther.

i don't love ice cream, but when it comes with my dad, driving and good jams, i'm in.

I vividly remember being the car with him, realizing he knew every word to the song "handyman"

I remember weird things. little things. Things i think i forgot. Until i remember.

It's crazy. But i'll remember what you said to me, even if you were half kidding. I'll remember every dinner plan broken, promise unfulfilled.

Lately, i've felt insignificant. Like i'm not any more than a blip on the radar to so many people. Even the ones i see every day. I don't factor into anyone's plans, almost ever.

People make plan only to never see them through.

also, please don't affirm me if you don't mean it. I can see through bullshit and what you think was a positive comment actually has the opposite effect when it's not sincere.

I feel like i try fairly hard in my relationships, only to not have it reciprocated.

and i'm only good enough when people need my help.

I'm helper, i like to help for sure, but i also have a heart that gets sad when people miss use it.

today is kind of discouraging. So to combat it, i called my dad, watched the gilmore girls and stayed away from people. it's only kind of worked.

I remember everything.

Everything that hurt me and everything that made me feel like a million bucks.

and that is the bulk of my problem.