Lately, as the day light fades quicker, and the wind blows a little bit harder than it normally does, I tend to reach harder for things that remind me of people and places that feel like home.
I couldn't even tell you why, but for whatever reason, I absolutely associate Fall with coming home and belonging to people and places. Missing pieces find their way home and the sun and fallen leaves show them how to get there.
I mean, yes, I have the most idealist, dreamy, romantic view of fall. Don't ruin it for me. I'm currently drinking Good Earth tea that smells like cinnamon and reminds me of Rita.
I also fall in love with books again this time of year. Words are so real, and drip from your tongue like honey. All the classics are alive, and i read Franny and Zooey for the 19 time and love it just as much as the first day I turned it's pages.
Today, I'm all about poetry. I think in lyrics, and hear in rhyme. and when Billy Collin's writes "Pardon my Egg Salad Stains, i think I'm love" in a poem about reading the Catcher in the Rye, i understand so much that there is a place for me in this season.
I stumbled across my copy of The House on Mango Street. It is well loved, well worn, ragged even, from being in my purse and read so often that there are pages that are on the brink of coming out. I challenge you to find anything better and more personal than an old book that you've read a million times with notes in margins about whatever was going through your mind then. it a reminder of who you were and reading it as who you are allows you to fall in love with change, and death and rebirth.
Anyway one of my favorite parts of Mango Street is the following:
" you can never have too much sky. You can fall asleep and wake up drunk on sky and sky can keep you safe when you're sad. Here, there is too much sadness and not enough of sky. Butterflies are too few and so are flowers and most things that are beautiful. Still, we take what we can get and make the best of it"
I love that. I can't even. I want that on a wall somewhere. It's just my favorite.
This last year has been quite interesting, as you well know, but I am feeling like myself again, like I'm coming home. Thanks in part to the power of words, and the staying power of beautiful phrases that can grab your heart, sock you in the gut, or jerk some tears.
So with all that gushy, whatever that was, said, I have some work to do. I have some dreams to build, so plans to make, and some phone calls to make. Starting with my mom and dad. I miss them and i love them and my heart is still there.
and since I'm on a music kick....you all know that Dave Barnes is my favorite but Nothin' Fancy is a gem. I heart, heart, heart it. Currently, it reminds me of my A-team, who is celebrating 10 years of lovin' each other for better or worse, which is so beautiful and i could just go on and on....but i wont...because this is all so disjointed already, and i write about them too much.
Just listen, i promise it will be worth it. Unless you totally hate my taste in music, in which case, i could give an eff.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPR-aLUdmRc
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